  
|
(1958-2012)
Marjorie Gottlieb Wolfe
Syosset, New York
|
|
Jeffrey Zaslow was a "mensh"/"mench"--an upright, honorable, decent person. He was
someone to admire and emulate.
Jeffrey Zaslow, who died recently in a tragic car accident in Michigan, was an American author, journalist and a columnist for the Chicago Sun-Times. He wrote about life transitions as The Wall Street Journal's "Moving On" columnist. Alongside the professor, Randy Pausch, Zaslow wrote "The Last Lecture," a best-selling "bukh." It was based on an uplifting lecture Pausch gave after having been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer.
Zaslow graduated from Carnegie Mellon, where he majored in creative writing. In 1980, he began his professional writing career at the Orlando Sentinel.
He and his wife, Sherry Margolis, lived with their three daughters in West Bloomfield, Michigan. Zaslow was killed while on tour for his book, "The Magic Room."
In 2009, I wrote a letter to the Bintel Brief in The Forward. Yes, the column was brought back, and Zaslow was one of the persons selected to reply to the questions. Other guest columnists included Dr. Ruth, Hanna Rosin, and Edward I. Koch.
My letter said:
----------------------------------------------
HELP! MY ADULT DAUGHTER'S A SCHNORRER
Dear Mr. Zaslow:
I raised three daughters in a nice middle-class, haimish home. My youngest daughter is a real schnorrer--a cheapskate.
She flaunts her frugality. Her home furnishings are "dumpster decor," and sometimes, she'll go to Costco and eat her lunch by sampling food served by the various demonstrators. Recently she told me, "Forget about dry cleaning a dress; that costs more than $8. I just donate it to the Salvation Army. They launder it, dry clean it, and I buy it back for two bucks!"
Is there something wrong with being so cheap, or her extreme lack of materialism something that should be commended-- especially in these difficult times?
MOTHER OF A SCHNORRER
--------------------------------------------
On March 15, 2009, Zaslow answered the
letter:
Dear Mother,
I wish I had gotten your letter earlier. My wife and I recently hosted our daughter's bat mitzvah. We didn't realize we could have bused everyone to Costco for the hors d'oeuvres hour!
Seriously, though, your adult daughter's frugality is her business, even if it may be bordering on an obsession. You may, however, want to lightly remind her that sometimes there are ethical issues involved.
For instance, it likely costs The Salvation Army more than $2 to clean her dress. Monetary donations allow the organization to maintain low prices and serve those in need. So your daughter is taking advantage of a system designed to help disadvantaged people clothe their families. If you gingerly explain it in that light, your daughter may agree that she doesn't want to indulge her own thriftiness if it negatively impacts others.
Our society's materialism is at the root of many of our economic problems today. So
yes, your daughter's instincts to live a simpler life should be commended. But she
ought to recalibrate when she finds herself
combining frugality with freeloading.
---------------------------------------------
Marjorie Wolfe does not have three daughters; she has three sons. However, she believes that this letter may represent a problem that is being faced by many Jewish and non-Jewish mothers today.
To the late Jeffrey Zaslow: "A leben ahf dein kop!" (Well done! Well said!)
| A | B | C | D | E | F | G | H | I | J | K | L | M |
| N | O | P | Q | R | S | T | U | V | W | Y | Z |
| Yiddish
Stuff Jewish Humor Schmooze News More Majorie Wolfe |
Principle Jewish Stories All Things Jewish Jewish Communities of the World |