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“A sheyn gelakhter” (Nothing to laugh about)
The Yiddish words meaning “size of garments” is “der numer”
Marjorie Gottlieb Wolfe
Syosset, New York
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Look at these headlines:
2007: |
SIZE ZERO: THE BLAME COUTURE |
2009: |
VANITY SIZING: THE INSANITY OF SIZE 0 HOLLYWOOD DRESS SIZE COUNTDOWN |
2011: |
ONE SIZE FITS NOBODY |
2014: |
J.CREW LAUNCHES SIZE 000, CONTROVERSY J.CREW INTRODUCES SIZE 000 IN CASE YOU DIDN’T FEEL BAD ENOUGH J.CREW’S NEW SIZE TRIPLE-ZERO JEANS: NECESSARY OR INSANITY? (FYI: Size 000 stands for extra-extra-extra small.) |
Have you noticed that skinny/thin (“dar”) is in vogue now? I recently attended a preview of my grandson, Scott’s, high school prom in Plainview, New York, and couldn’t help but notice the beautiful, “shlank” (slim) figures on the 17-18-year-old girls. There were very few females that we would label, “a hipshe meydl”--a hefty girl!
Perhaps Susan Head, Ph.D. was right when she said, “Size is the latest way to evaluate self-worth.” And, yes, studies show that women tend to feel “beser” (better) and buy more when we fit into a “klener” (smaller) size.
Retailer, J.Crew, just launched size 000. It fits “der froy” (the woman) with a 23-inch “talye” (waist) according to the company’s size chart.
J.Crew knows that size 000 already exists as toddler 4T?” wrote twitter user @sassycurmudgeon. Another twitter wrote, “J.Crew now offers size 000 pants for Americans who want a new cool HEADBAND.”
What is “vanity sizing”? It’s the practice of assigning smaller sizes to “klayder” (clothing) to essentially flatter someone into making a purchase. (Note: The Yiddish word meaning “to flatter” is “khanfenen.”) So, a woman who wears a size 12, is more likely to buy a dress if it’s a size 8, because it makes her feel good about “zich” (herself).
A google search for vanitysizing.com showed a message that says, “What’s next, NEGATIVE NUMBERS?”
Joan E. Greve says that “According to standard size measurements, that an average 155 pound woman should be wearing a size 16, but thanks to vanity-sizing, she’s probably buying a size 10 or 12.”
J.Crew says that the new size was introduced in May (2014) when they launched two stores in Hong Kong, and the 000 is only available on its
website (“vebzaytl”). Note: On their website they carry up to size 20 and
extended sizes in shoes and swimwear.
Has J.Crew’s vanity sizing reached a new level of “meshugeh”? Perhaps
we should read what Rabbi Benjamin Blech (“The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Learning Yiddish”) said about dressing or overdressing. The Yiddish
word for an overdressed woman is “oisgetsatsket.” Blech says, “So what
if it’s 100 degree weather in Miami Beach. She still has to wear her mink
coat so that everyone will know she has one. The diamonds will go over
the rainbow-colored dress, with the slit from the bosom to the pupik (belly
button). The oisgetsatskete woman believes she’s making a fashion
statement. She is--and the word is tasteless.”
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MARJORIE GOTTLIEB WOLFE will NOT reveal her BMI. BUT, she
will share this “vunderlekh” (wonderful) story:
Rachel says to her husband, “Should I wear the mink or the sable? Should I put on the tiara or the brooch? Should I wear this necklace (“haldzband”) or that one?” Max replies,“Any one you vant, dahling, but please hurry or we’ll miss the early-bird special.”
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