TO TZA TZA GABOR,
MADOFF IS NO "DAHLING"
(to confess)

by
Marjorie Gottlieb Wolfe

Syosset, New York

Tza Tza Gabor, 91, the legendary "aktrise" (actress) is known for her comic quips about the 3 m's:  men, marriage, and materialism.

She has said:

• "Conrad Hllton was very generous ("breythartsik") to me in the divorce ("get") settlement.  He gave me 5,000 Gideon Bibles.
  
  
• "I  want a man who's kind and understanding  Is that too much to ask of a millionaire?"
  
  
• "I don't take gifts from perfect strangers - but then, nobody is perfect."
  
  
• "I never hated a man enough to give him  diamonds back."

Zsa Zsa elevated the word "dahling" to high art.  When asked, "How are your sisters?"
she would reply, "They are fabulous dahling.  Eva has married this nice attorney who wants to live on a farm and Magda is even more fabulous than Eva, dahling."

When asked, "Ms. Gabor, what are your feelings about red China?" she replied, "Well, dahling, on a yellow table cloth it's not so bad!"

Zsa Zsa will never call Bernard Madoff, "dahling"!  Because of him she is reportedly facing ruin.  The Yiddish words meaning to ruin are "khorev makhn."

Her ninth husband, Prince Frederic von Anhalt, said that Madoff's scam has cost them millions.  He told the National
Enquirer, "We're mad ("broygez"). We want our money back.  We might be forced to sell our Bel Air home, cars,  jewelry ("tsirung") because of this sick man.  This scam artist should be dragged through the streets and flogged."

Anhalt accepts the "shuld" (blame); he convinced his wife of 23 years to invest their fortunes into Madoff's funds.  He and Zsa Zsa are taking legal action to recoup some of the money back.

In addition to Gabor, Kevin Bacon, Kyra Sedgwick, Steven Spielberg, Elie Wiesel, and Eric Roth (writer of "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button) have also lost money to Madoff.

David Pelzer ("Moving Forward - Taking The Lead In Your Life") writes, "A lot of of folks who buy into the illusion of who's 'all that' "Who's all so with it.  Who's so all powerful...that person with the deliberate 'check me out' swagger, the way-too-busy, you're-so-below-me, can't- won't ever-give-you-the-time-of-day attitude... If it's not the small-fish wanna-bes we as a society just can't seem to stop idolizing as drool seeps from our gasping mouths, then it's the over-the-top tycoon, big-city heavy hitters, the players who prey, those who make the unimaginable, unfathomable deals."

Pelzer continues:  "But then, sooner or later, something happens...And all those boastful words, all those power 'techniques,' are not worth the papers they were printed on.
The party is indeed over."

Pelzer then talks about responsibility ("akhrayes"):

"I know you know there are no guarantees in life, particularly in the stock market, but when those in a position of responsibility say, 'Follow me, trust me,' they should at the very least know where they're going. And if they get lost, when they screw up, they should be the first to take--um, what's the word?  Oh, Yeah:  responsibility."

Well, Hungarian-born Tza Tza will never call 'Uncle Bernie' a "dahling."  Yes, as Joseph Epstein wrote in Newsweek (Jan. 19, 2009), "Madoff soaked the rich, but he seems to have specialized in soaking
the Jewish rich."  Epstein wrote, "My father used to say that it is good to be cheated every once in a while.  Being cheated, he held, teaches humility, reminds you that you aren't as smart as you thought you were.  It's good for the mental hygiene."

He needs to show a little more "mitgefil" (sympathy)

_________________
MARJORIE GOTTLIEB WOLFE and Bernard Madoff
are both graduates of Far Rockaway High School, located in Queens, New York.
Marjorie wishes him "a finstern yor oyf dir!"(A dark year on you.)

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___________________________________________
Marjorie Gottlieb Wolfe is the author of
two books:

"Yiddish for Dog & Cat Lovers" and
"Are Yentas, Kibitzers, & Tummlers Weapons of Mass Instruction?  Yiddish
Trivia."  To order a copy, go to her
website: MarjorieGottliebWolfe.com

NU, what are you waiting for?  Order the book!