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REALITY "TELEVISYE'* WITH HUMMUS

*The Yiddish word for television is "televisye"

by
Marjorie Gottlieb Wolfe
marjorie
Syosset, New York
Reality "Televisye" has become an integral part of television and our "kultur" (culture).

In many reality TV shows, the viewer and the "aparat" (camera) are passive observers.  They follow people about their daily personal and professional activities. We often call this "fly on the wall" or "Factual television."

"Jon & Kate Plus 8" is the TLC reality-show where Jon and Kate Gosselin were the parents of "akht" (8) children.  Now that the parents are separated, some friends report that Jon is acting more like "der bokher" (the bachelor).  He's blowing his earnings ($75,000 per episode) on his 23-year-old girlfriend and a ritzy lifestyle of expensive restaurants, shopping sprees and a fancy-shmancy Manhattan pad.

Kate, who was "der khezhben-firer" (accountant) in their family, told Foxnews.com that Jon got a certain amount of money per week and that was it.  Now that he's "fray" (free) of all that control, he's like a kid with play money...He needs to cut back on spending because once the show ends, the money will completely dry up.

There's a new Israeli reality TV show which will be in production by the end of this year.  It's called HAOLIM.  According to Noam Shalev (Highlight Films), "We began developing this program last year (2008), and we were supposed to begin actual production - auditions and shooting - in April of 2009.  However the financial crisis hit some of our sponsors, and we decided to postpone the production.  The program will be sponsored by public organizations, private sponsors and commercial sources (advertisers, TV stations). We plan to re-consider the best timeframe to re-launch the program by the end of this year."

Noam Shalev, TV producer/Managing Director of Highlight Films said he is not aware of any other reality show dealing with aliya/aliyah.

Aliyah (ah-lee-YAH) is a Hebrew word; "aliyot" is plural.  Literally, it means "to go up."  It means the honor of being called up to the bimah to recite a blessing before and after the Torah reading.  It also means--in this case--the act of immigrating to Israel.

As it says in the Tenach (Jewish Bible): "Arise, and let us return to our people." (Jeremiah 46:16).

Making aliyah isn't always easy.  Laura Ben-David, author of "Moving Up:  An Aliyah" wrote,

"So I was speaking to a new Olah recently about her experiences.  As her Hebrew is decent, and she is very organized, she expected things to go smoothly.

The other day she went to sign up for Ulpan.  She gathered her Teudat Oleh and the Ulpan voucher and headed over to meet with the Ulpan director.  All was going fine until she confidently handed over her documents, only to be told that the 'voucher' she brought was the contract for her exterminator!"

And in 2008, Frances Greenberg, finally made Israel her home after a failed attempt over 60 years ago on the Exodus ship, that was filled with 4500 Holocaust survivors, and sent back to Europe by the British. She made aliyah at last!!!

The program, HAOLIM, will begin when "akht" (8) competitors arrive at Ben-Gurion Int'l "fliplats" (airport) on the same day. Over the next three months, , beginning at "der bagazh" (the baggage) claim, "they will learn to live with cameras in their faces," says Noam Shalev.

What's the concept?  Eight "yung" Olim from different countries live together in a "groys" (large) house in Tel Aviv.  They each have to pool their finances (think old skool kibbutz), and accomplish various tasks, while going through the "geveyntlekh" (usual) shtick that one goes through as a new "imigrant."  There will be hilarity and "hartsveytik" (heartache) as they open bank accounts, cope with the rules of aliyah- related paperwork, and "gerangl" (struggle) with learning Hebrew words and grammar in the Ulpan or Hebrew-language school.

What are the qualifications for these 4 men and women?  They must be Jewish, between 20 and 29 years old, fluent in English, with little or no Hebrew skills, and committed to making aliyah soon.

In order for their application to be "fulshtendik" (complete), they must send a recent photo of themselves, write an essay of no more than 500 words explaining the reasons behind their aliyah and why they think they have what it takes to be the Ultimate Oleh or Olah.  They may submit a video.  A charismatic personality is a plus!

And what does the winner get?  A golden ticket into Israeli society:  an apartment ("dire") facing Tel Aviv's waterfront ("vaser-fornt"), a new "oyto" (car), a lucrative job, and "a sakh mer" (a lot more).

Chaim Waxman, a sociologist who has spent years studying attitudes toward aliyah in the west and in Israel, predicts that the show will be a flop.  He says that most Israelis are not curious enough about Western immigrants to put up with the hassle of English-language programming with subtitles. 

I disagree with Waxman.  From my experience, most of us love reality TV. The folks on those shows are the only ones we know who have more problems than we do.

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___________________________________________
Marjorie Gottlieb Wolfe is the author of
two books:
yiddish for dog and cat loversbook
"Yiddish for Dog & Cat Lovers" and
"Are Yentas, Kibitzers, & Tummlers Weapons of Mass Instruction?  Yiddish
Trivia."  To order a copy, go to her
website: MarjorieGottliebWolfe.com

NU, what are you waiting for?  Order the book!

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