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SHOW-AND-TELL IN 'TSVEYTER KLAS"*
*In Yiddish, Second Grade Is Written "Tsveyter Klas"|
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SHOW-AND-TELL IN 'TSVEYTER KLAS"*
*In Yiddish, Second Grade Is Written "Tsveyter Klas"
School Opens Next Week. Although I Retired
From Teaching High School 16 Years Ago,
There's Still That Excitement When I See The
School Bus Picking Up The Kids That First Day
Of Classes. I Can Actually Smell Chalk Dust!
I Can Still Quote Isaac Bashevis Singer:
"Children Read Books, Not Reviews. They
Don't Give A Hoot About The Critics."
I Remember The Stories That Sam Levenson
Wrote About His School Experiences. His
Mother "Measured Time Not By Seconds,
Minutes, Or Hours, But By The Milestones
And Tombstones That Marked The Road Of
Her Life."
When Sam Asked His Mother, "When Was I
Born?" She Replied, "How Could I Forget?
You Were Born On The Night The Titanic Sank."
Levenson Continues, "When The Time Came To Register Us At School, The Clerk
Demanded
More Exact Dates Of Birth. She Refused To
Write Down Mama's 'it Was On The Third Day
Of Passover.'"
My Sister-in-law E-mailed Me A Story Titled,
"The Middle Wife," Which Was Written By An
Anonymous 2nd Grade Teacher. Here's The
Yiddish Version: Enjoy!
've Been Teaching Now For About "Fuftsn" (15) Years. I Have Two Kids Myself, But The Best "Geburt" (Birth) Story I Know Is The One I Saw In My Own Second-grade "Klastsimer" (Classroom) A Few Years Back.
When I Was A Kid I Loved Show-and-tell. So I Always Have A Few Sessions With My Students. It Helps Them Get Over Shyness And Usually Show-and-tell Is Pretty Tame. Kids Bring In Pet Turtles, Model Airplanes, Pictures Of Fish They Catch, Stuff Like That, And I Never, Ever Place Any Boundaries Or Limitations On Them. If They Want To "Shlep" Them To School And Talk About It, They're Welcome.
Well, One Day This Little "Meydl," Erica, A "Brilyant," Very Outgoing Kid, Takes Her Turn And Waddles Up To The Front Of "Der Klas" With A Pillow Stuffed Under Her "Sveter."
She Holds Up A "Fotografye' Of An Infant. "This Is Luke, My Baby "Bruder," And I'm Going To Tell You About His "Geboyrn-tog" (Birthday).
First, Mom And Dad Made Him As A Symbol Of Their Love, And Then Dad Put A Seed In My Mother's Stomach, And Luke Grew In There. He Ate For "Nayn" Months Through An Umbrella Cord."
She's Standing There With Her Hands On "Di Kishn" (The Pillow), And I'm Trying Not To Laugh And Wishing I Had My Camcorder With Me. The Kids Are Watching Her In Amazement.
"Then, About Two Saturdays Ago, My Mom Starts Say And Going 'oh, Oh, Oh, Oh!" Erica Puts A 'hant' Behind Her Back And Groans. "She Walked Around The House For Like An Hour, 'oh, Oh, Oh!' Now This Kid Is Doing A Hysterical Duck Walk And Groaning.
"My Dad Called The Middle Wife. She Delivers Babies, But She Doesn't
Have A Sign
On "Der Oytomobile" Like The Domino's Man.
They Got My Mom To Lie Down In "Bet" Like
This." Erica Lies Down With Her Back Against
The Wall.
And Then, Pop! My Mom Had This Bag Of
"Vaser" (Water) She Kept In There In Case He
Got "Dorshtik" (Thirsty), And It Just Blew Up
And Spilled All Over The Bed, Like Psshhheew!" This Kid Has Her Legs
Spread
With Her Little Hands Miming Water Flowing
Away. It Was Too Much!
"Then The Middle Wife Starts Saying 'push,
Push,' And 'breathe, Breathe.' They Started
Counting, But Never Even Got Past 'tsen'
(10). Then, All Of A Sudden, Out Comes My
'bruder.' He Was Covered In Yucky Stuff
That They All Said It Was From Mom's
Play-center, So I Don't Know What Kind
Of Toys Are In There...
Then Erica Stood "Aroyf" (Up), Took A
Theatrical Bow And Returned To Her "Zitsort"
(Seat).
I'm Sure I Applauded The Loudest. Ever Since Then, When It's Show-and-tell Day, I Bring My Camcorder, Just In Case Another "Middle Wife" Comes Along.
____________
Marjorie Wolfe Wishes Everyone--teachers
And Students--a "Vunderlekh" (Wonderful)
School Year.
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