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"Gut gezogt." (Well said)
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Recently a hick town in Idaho decided to go big time and install a traffic light, but the authorities didn't know whether to make it " royt" (red) or "grin" (green). :-)
"Oyf an emes" (Seriously), National Public Radio (NPR) reported about a town outside of Chicago that has created a new road sign designed to be used in conjunction with the universally recognized stop sign. "An emese mayse." (A true story.)Officials from Park Ridge, a Chicago suburb, state that the standard stop sign is no longer "efektiv" (effective). It only serves as an invitation to slow down. The "nay" (new) sign, also a red octagon, reads 'STOP MEANS STOP," and is installed just "unter" (below) the existing stop sign.
A STOP SIGN means stop. It's simple and " klor" (clear). It's instantly recognizable and the "kolir" (color) and shape is employed around "di velt" (the world).
Ken Leiser, of the St. Louis Post-Dispatch, wrote, "Stop signs are overrated as a way to control speeders on neighborhood ("shkheyneshaft") streets. In fact, there's evidence that too many signs actually could make some people drive faster."
And there's some "raye" (evidence) that an overabundance of stop signs is bad for "di luft" (the air). Frequent stops increase the emissions spewing from the "oytomobile" tailpipe.
Why even those on a "velopsiped" (bicycle) do not obey stop signs. They feel that the law doesn't apply to them. "Only cars have to obey the law. As a cyclist, I can ride however I like, so long as I avoid hitting an 'oyto' or pedestrian."
Rabbi Adam at JoozNooz.com (Chabad), recently shared the following joke on his website...and I thank him for sharing it with me.
WHAT IF G-D HIMSELF COMMANDED JEWS TO COME TO A STOP AT A STOP SIGN:
1. An anti-religious Jew rejects the sign as a vestige of an archaic and outmoded value system with no relevance to the modern world ("velt") and ignores it completely.
2. A modern Biblical critic claims that each letter of the sign S-T-O-P was not written by Moses, but by 4 individual public works employees. But now our Biblical critic is confused as to how to proceed since for 3000 years no one ever came up with such an excuse not to stop.
3. The average secular Jew won't bother to read the sign but will stop if the Jew in the car in front of him does; or if his Jewish mother insists.
4. A Reform Jew coasts up to the sign while contemplating the question, "Do I personally feel commanded to stop?"
5. A Reconstructionist Jew reasons: First, this sign is a legacy of our historic civilization and therefore I must honor it. However, I must decide whether stopping is spiritually, intellectually, or culturally compelling enough to be worth perpetuating.
6. A Conservative Jew calls his rabbi and asks whether stopping at this sign is really literal and, therefore, required; or is there another way to interpret it.
7. A modern Orthodox Jew will avoid the inconvenience of the above and take another route to work without stop signs so that he won't be obligated to stop in the first place.
8. An ordinary Orthodox Jew will avoid the stop sign, and makes the blessing, "Blessed art thou, O L-rd our G-d, King of the Universe, who has sanctified us with thy commandments and has commanded us to stop at stop signs," and, before proceeding, waits exactly 3 seconds according to his watch (the minimal measurement of what constitutes a "stop" according to Halacha, the Code of Jewish Law).
9. A Haredi ("ultra-Orthodox") does the same thing as the Orthodox Jew, except stands and shakes when he says "di brokhe" (the blessing), and waits 10 seconds instead of 3 (the longest measurement of what constitutes a "stop" according to Halacha). He also replaces his brake lights with 1000-watt searchlight and connects his horn so that it is activated whenever he touches the brake pedal).
10. The Chabad Rabbi (like Rabbi Adam) is particularly happy to stop for he knows that any given stop could be the stop that brings the Mosiach! Afterwards, he gets out of the car and sets up a roadside Judaica stand, taking his stopping opportunity to ask other Jewish drivers who stop at the sign whether they would like to put on tefillin (black prayer boxes) and come over his house for a Friday night Shabbat dinner.
Marjorie Gottlieb Wolfe stops at ALL stop signs. Her advice: Speeding motorists might do well to remember that it's "beser" (better) to be a little late down here than too early up there.'
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Marjorie G. Wolfe is no "kikh" stranger." She says, "Eat,
it's a mitzvah."
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