PROMS ARE 'VUNDERLEKH" (wonderful)
THE "TSVEYTER" (second) TIME AROUND
Marjorie Gottlieb Wolfe
Syosset, New York
A recent newspaper ad read:
PROMGOERS: Reserve your limousine
NOW unless you want to go in your
father's Oldsmobile! Call (516)...
are not just for high school seniors! Just last year, The Jewish Home & Hospital
Lifecare System in New York City,
held a Senior Prom for their Manhattan
Division residents and patients. Over 125
people attended the balloon-filled
auditorium in their finest outfits, including
ball gowns and tuxedos.The evening featured a live band, dancing,
a conga-line and corsages and boutonnieres. The prom featured a live
tango performance by three talented
couples, and the evening culminated in the
crowning of a Prom King and Queen.Yes, proms are "vungerlekh" the "tsveyter" time
To make the most of this "ovnt" (evening),
seniors should keep these thoughts in
Your "yung" (young) host may define a
PROM as "Programmable Read Only
Your prom is NOT an "early-bird special";
stay until 11 p.m. and enjoy "dos gantse" (the whole) affair
Vintage prom dresses are "in." So
are designer tuxedos by After Six, Calvin
Klein, Geoffrey Beene, Pierre Cardin, and
Fumagalli's. Don't be surprised if one of
the hosts asks if you're wearing the 2006
BASIC LINE--formals for the high-tech
senior citizen--with jackets in Lemon Byte,
Apple Red, or Silicon Gray
(Note: A high-tech senior
a "tselularer telefon" (cell phone), "pazhir" (pager), "kompyuter" (computer), "kol-post" (voice mail), and his own"vebzaytl" (website).
Say "shalom" to the band
leader. Do reminisce about the music of Archie
Bleyer, Frank Parker and Marion
Marlowe, Julius LaRosa, the McGuire
Sisters, Haleloke, the Chordettes, and
Feel free to "zingen" the song, "Vi Zenen
Mayne Yunge Yoren?" (Where Are My
Ladies, do enjoy your complimentary
Remember that in the language of flowers, the "gel" (yellow)
rose means friendship, the "royt" (red)
rose means love, and the "orkhidee"(orchid) means business!
Ask one of the "yung" hosts their
interpretation of the new verb being used
among the allegedly young at heart: "to
party." According to Bob Green "Cheeseburgers"),
...a party which means
some sort of dance. They were often held at the high school
gym; we would take our shoes off so as
not to mar the basketball court, and we
would do steps such as the Pony or the
Jerk to the sound of records or a live
band. 'I'm going to party my ("grobkayt" - or obscenity) off tonight,'
which is what
many current-day partyers say.
If there's a lull in the table
conversation, talk to your "yung" host about "hybrid" cars like the "Prius," the
Holmes baby, "Suri," "Bark Bar Mitzvahs," the return
of the mumps, Adam Sandler, and the fact that The Jewish Museum in
NYC, which for the first time will stay open
on the Jewish Sabbath.
Listen as your host shares his/her
most embarrassing moment: he proudly
informed an admissions counselor at an
Ivy League college that he had been "abducted" into the National
Society at his high school. Share the
time that you asked a waiter for a "slice"of demi-tasse.
Share this piece titled, "The Joys of Aging
or Seniors Delight":
I have become quite a frivolous old
gal. I'm seeing five gentlemen every
day. As soon as I awake, Will Power
helps me out of bed. When he leaves,
I go to see John. Then Charley Horse
comes along. When he is here, he
takes a lot of my attention. When he
leaves, Arthur Ritis shows up and stays
the rest of the day. He doesn't like to
stay in one place very long, so he takes
me from joint to joint. After such a busy
day, I'm really tired and read to go to
bed with Ben Gay. What a day!
Savor the home-made culinary treats. "Diete" (diet) tomorrow!
Recall, with "gelekhter" (laughter) your childhood--
that "vunderlekh" period when all you
needed to lose "vog" (weight) was to
take a bath.
And, follow the advice of Gore Vidal,
ladies: sit next to a man in a turban.
You'll get photographed more.
Marjorie Gottlieb Wolfe attended her
prom with other seniors at Far Rockaway
High School in 1955. Her date: a young
man whose last name is Lowitt.