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HOTLINE
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Note: "Khanike" is the correct Yiddish
transliteration for Hanukkah
You have reached the "Khanike" Hotline.
Listen carefully since some of our options
have changed.
For the lyrics to the dreydl ("dreidel") song,
Press l.
Ikh bin a kleyner dreydl
gemakht bin ikh fun blay
to kumt-zhe ale shpiln
in dreydl, eyns, tsvey, dray
(Popular translation)
I have a little dreydl,
I made it out of clay
And when it's dry and ready,
Then dreydl I shall play.
One, two, three
For an explanation of how a dreydl "made
out of clay" could last more than one spin,
Press 2.
For the poem "Twas The Night Before
Chanukah,"
Press 3.
'Twas The Nght Before Chanukah...
Oy! What a shock!
Somebody outside
was picking our lock.
And there at the door
stood a "zayda" in blue--
and he wore on his kup
a blue yarmulka, too!
His punim was sheyn--
Everybody would love it!
'Round his neck hung a chain
with a gold Mogen Dovid!
He wore silken tsitzes
beneath his wool vest
and a small flag of Israel
was draped on his chest!
He said, "I'm not burglar,
so please don't be nervous.
I'm the spirit of Chanukah,
here at our service!"
"Menchen all call me
Reb' Shalom Shapiro
Without me, this Yom-Tov
might need a new 'hero!'"
"I visit all yidlach,
and bring - kinnahorra -
good fortun as bright
as a glowing menorah!"
"Ich shlepn lots of blessings
and Chanukah gelt,
and joys that are takka
the best in der velt!"
"If you know nice menchen,
I'll visit them quick,
and I'll bring them gezunt
and a houseful of glik!"
So we sent him to your house,
and shook hands and parted.
He shouted, "Shalom!"
out the doorway he darted!
He ran to a wagon
with horses ahead.
He fed them some bagels,
and here's what he said:
"Let's go, Moish and Mende!
Make quick, Moe and Yussle!
Please give a rush, Malkah!
Hey, Hymie, please hustle!"
Then he raced like the wind!
And they galloped so shnel,
all his clothing blew off,
and his gatkes as well!
Soon he was so kalt
that his tushie turned bluish!
He moaned and he hollered
in English and Jewish!
So, Don't act embarrassed,
and please don't be rude
when that frostbitten zayda
arrives in the nude!
Quick! Wrap him in blankets!
Don't beat 'round the bush!
And tie a hot water bag
on his cold tush!
Quick! Feed him some chicken soup
heys as can be!
And give him some shnapps
and a glez'l hot tea!
'Cause he brings you a houseful
of Chanukah wishes
as warm and geshmak
as plate of hot knishes!
And he brings them from our house
so friendly and bright,
so your house will keep glowing
with Chanukah light.
Plus joy sweet as tsuker
and peace and good-cheer
and everything fraylekh
each day of the year!
And none in your family
will be a shlimazl,
for life will bring each of you
simchas and mazel!
And all through the future
your hopes will come true,
and himmel will bless
your mishpokhe and you!!!
For a list of popular holiday books,
Press 4 + "BUKH"
"Can I Have a Cell Phone for Hanukkah?"
by Sharon Estroff. $12.95
"Bubbie and Zadie Come To My House -
A Story for Hanukkah"
by Daniel Halevi Bloom. $16.95
"One Fish Two Fish Red Fish Blue Fish"
(Yiddish language)
Translation by Sholem Berger
For a list of Hanukkah gifts for your "hunt"
(dog),
Press 5 + HUNT
A Chanukkah doggie gift box from the "Bow Wow Dog Bakery" ($9.95, plus shipping)
Planning on a B-A-R-K Mitzvah for your
13-year-old dog? Purchase Shari Cohen's
book, "Alfie's Bark Mitzvah."
Price: $18,
USA; $21, Canada
Aunt Joann's organic dog treats in Hanukkah symbols are available from
"Paws on the Avenue," 409 Lake Avenue,
Lake Worth, Florida.. $.50 to $.75 each.
"Yiddish for Dog & Cat Lovers" by Marjorie Gottlieb Wolfe. $13
For a list of calories consumed at a Hanukkah party,
Press 6 + "KALORYE"
According to Bonnie Taub-Dix, registered dietitian, two potato pancakes ("latkes"), topped with sour cream and applesauce, 1 doughnut, and 1 glass of sweet wine ("vayn"), contains 750 calories.
For a quote by Molly Katz ("Jewish As A
Second Language") about wrapping paper,
Press 7 + "PAPIR"
"Gifts are opened carefully, using a pencil
to lift the tape, so the paper can be saved.
It isn't reused; that would be cheap. But
it's a crime to throw away such lovely
paper."
For a quote by Joshua Halbertam
("Schmoozing") about the elevation of
Chanukah to a major Jewish holiday,
Press 8 + "YONTEV"
Chanukah was a relatively minor holiday in Europe and has become a major Jewish holiday in the U. S. today. "The Talmud devoted a scant two pages to Chanukah while dedicating an entire volume to Purim," said Halberstam.
For a list of holiday gift spending, by income group,
Press 9 + "GELT"
Consumers say they'll spend an average $546 on gifts this 2008 holiday season, down from $637 in 2007. Spending plans, by income group:
Under $25,000 $283
$25,000-$344,999 439
$35,000-$49.999 650
$50,000-$74,999 575
$75,000-$99,999 678
$100,000 821
(Source: Maritz Poll of 1,525 adults, Oct. 14-28)
A box of 300 Chanukah Fortune Cookies
from Kosherman, $64. One example of
Chanukah fortunes: "May your pastrami
never have mayonnaise on it."
To order,
Press 10.
A "No Limit Texas Dreidel," a combination of dreidel and poker,
is available from "moderntribe.com"
Price: $19.95. "A shande un a kharpe!?"
(A shame and disgrace?) Lighten up!
Press 11.
To decorate dreidels, dress up as a
Macabee, and more, visit the 92nd Street Y
on 12/14. Cost: $20 adults; $15 children
Press 12.
To read about Anne Frank, who celebrated
Hanukkah in the attic of a house in
Amsterdam,
Press 13.
Anne wrote in her now famous diary for
Dec. 7, 1942: "We just gave each other a
few little presents and then we lit the
candles. Because of the shortage of
candles, we only had them alight for ten
minutes."
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