In every generation ("dor"), Jews have been taught to demonstrate "rakhmones"-- compassion.

Perhaps you heard the one about "Irish Eddie' Finnegan crying "rakhmones" as he was being pounded to the ground  by Benny Leonard.  It turns out "Irish Eddie" was really Seymour Rosenbaum!

The No Child Left Behind federal act has many students spending the majority of their day reading, writing and practicing math.  However, a new study finds that "kharakhter" (character) education, anti- bullying efforts and lessons in respecting and empathizing with others can actually raise children's test scores.

Wikipedia defines "empathy" as the capability to share and understand another's emotion and feelings.  It is often characterized as the ability to "put oneself into another's shoes," or in some way experience what the other person is feeling. "Rakhmones"/"rachmunis" is the Yiddish word for empathy and mercy.

Researchers at the Univ. of Illinois analyzed the findings of more than 200 students. They found that when schools help kids learn to manage their emotions and practice empathy and caring, both their behavior and their grades improve.

In 1999, Monica Viega described what went on in her "klastsimer" (classoom):  Jerry Springer fights.  Anger and incivility among the 5th graders sometimes grew so intense that "mebl" (furniture) would get tossed across the room.

Since then, her Bialock Elementary School ( Atlanta, GA) students sit in a circle and discuss how they treat one another.  They talk about what they see on the "televisye" news and about keeping drugs and violence out of their neighborhood.

Why the sudden interest in character education?  Why is it growing in Georgia and other states?

Tragedies such as the killings at Columbine High School and the shootings at Heritage High School (Conyers, GA), have prompted some to regard character education as a way to prevent "gvald" (violence).  Studies have also shown that character education is NOT EMPHASIZED within most schools of education.  (The writer NEVER heard the term used in her education courses at NYU.)

The New York Times (4/5/09) had an article titled, "Schools' Gossip Girls and Boys Get Some Lessons in Empathy."  Scarsdale, NY, is one of many districts which have found empathy workshops and curriculums help curb fighting and other misbehavior/mischief ("shtiferay").  Some schools are focusing more on empathy, with lessons about the Holocaust.  In some middle schools students are taught to eliminate the term "retard" and to be more careful of what is said about other students.

I recently had the pleasure of reading the book, "In the Spirit of the Maggid" by Rabbi Paysach J. Krohn.  The book contains a story titled, "One-Stop Shop" and makes one think about the meaning of "rachmanus." (I thank them for allowing me to share this story and recommend that everyone read the ENTIRE book.)

It was going to be a simple stop at the grocery store on the way home from yeshivah but it turned out to be much more than that.  The spontaneity, compassion and genuine "ahavas Yisrael" inherent in this story are remarkable.  I am grateful to Rabbi Moshe Grossman of Brooklyn for telling it to me.

It was 1 o'clock on Tuesday afternoon and Chaim Teitz (*) was on his way home after his morning study session at his kollel. His wife called him on his cell phone and asked him to pick up some cereal, milk and pastries for the children.  Chaim and his wife Rina always shopped at Mendel's Grocery (*) on Coney Island Avenue in Brooklyn, even though they knew that his prices were a bit higher than the local supermarket.

Mendel Dorfman (*) was a kind sweet man, who went out of his way for every customer.  Over the years, most of these small mom-and-pop grocery stories in large cities had closed, as they could no longer compete with the big supermarkets that charged less for most products.  However, Mendel's loyal customers remained with him because they knew he needed the parnassah (livelihood) and because no supermarket could match the individualized attention Mendel dispensed--not to mention his nice thought on the parshah of the week at the check-out counter.

As Chaim finished gathering the items he needed, he approached the check-out counter where three men were waiting in line.  Mendel was at the register, but he was preoccupied with a telephone call and motioned for the customers to wait

"Listen, Mrs. Margolis" (*), Mendel was saying, "I will be happy to send over your order, but is there any way you can pay me at least part of your bill?  You owe over a $100 and you haven't given me any money in months."

Mendel was quiet as the lady on the other end of the line was talking.  He let her finish and then he said, "Yes, I understand, but I have suppliers to pay, you know I am not a rich man.  You haven't paid me anything in such a long time."

Once again he was quiet as the lady on the line was responding, "No, no."  Mendel interrupted her.  "Don't worry.  I'm sending your order.  I was just hoping for some payment, but don't worry, you will get the order.  There is no need to cancel it."

The four young men looked at one another marveling at Mendel's kindness and sensitivity.  While he was still on the phone, they huddled together.  "Imagine the rachmanus on that poor woman," said one of the men.

"She is obviously a good person.  You can see that from the way Mendel was talking to her," said another.

"And it's a rachmanus on Mendel as well," said a third.  "He's not rolling in money and he's entitled to something, wouldn't you say?"

"So shouldn't we do something?" the fourth man said, expressing what was on all their minds.  "Think we could each manage 250?" one of them asked.

They all nodded and smiled.  Two of them had checks and two of them had cash. Within a minute they put their money together, four times $250 equaling $1000, and handed it to Mendel while he was still on the phone.

He looked at the money in amazement and understood what had transpired.  "Wait, wait, Mrs. Margolis," he practically yelled into the telephone.  "There is no need to worry.  Your bill has just been paid.  You don't owe me a thing!"

The men smiled though they could not hear what Mrs. Margolis was saying.  "Really, really," Mendel said, "the Ribo Shel Olam" just sent malachim (angels) to my store. You'll have the order within an hour."

Mendel smiled and added, "Mrs. Margolis, you've got a new slate.  Don't be embarrassed.  The Ribono Shel Olam takes care of His people!"

(*) means that the names have been changed.