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*In Yiddish, "es gefelt mir" means "it pleases me"
I recently had "di fargenign" (the pleasure)
of visiting Grace Gottlieb, the 90+-year-old
mother of a dear friend of mine. She recently gave up her apartment and
moved
into a senior residence in West Palm Beach,
Florida.
We shared old and new photo albums and stories about her children, grandchildren, and "di ureyniklekh" (great-grandchildren).
For those of you with elderly (AKA "seasoned") parents, there is nothing more uplifting for them than to ask them about things that happened in their lives when they were "yung." True, some of these stories will include memories that aren't so pleasant: the loss of a mate, the Holocaust, the Depression, etc. But, these need to be shared, too. It will give the listener a better understanding of the other person.
Reminscence promotes mental and emotional health; it combats feelings of isolation, loneliness, and "more-shkhoyre" (depression/sadness).
Studies have shown that older people who spend time remembering their lives, putting events into perspectve, and discussing things that happened decades ago, are happier and healthier than those who try to "put the past behind them."
In ads for Morse Life/Morse Geriatric Center, etc., we read:
He remembers when an ice cream cost a nickel
And when a nickel made him feel rich
He'll never forget December 7, 1941
And remembers exactly where he was on November 22, 1963
He cried when his little girl married in '74
And when she made him a grandpa 2 years later
At 85 he's got 101 stories
And every one of them is worth listening to.
A second ad says,
She became a war bride when that's what love meant
And became a homemaker because
that's what women did
She was there when you broke your doll
And when someone broke your heart
She was always on your side...
Even when you thought she wasn't
She taught you about goodness,kindness, life and love
Without ever saying a word.
And, finally, a third, very touching ad,
He shoveled snow for a quarter in '32
And went to college on the GI bill in '48
He started his business in '53
And never missed a day's work
He sent 3 sons to college
And lost one to 9/11
In a lifetime of memories...
It's the one he'll never forget
As others slowly fade away
"Vos iz der untershte shure?"
(What is the bottom line?)
Remember the 3 R's? Let's add a 4th:
Reminiscence! Reminiscence is a universal experience. It can be particularly important
to older people. It can build a bridge
between the older person and those who
care for them.
_____________________________
Marjorie Gottlieb Wolfe has a 96-year-old
father and a 98-year-old aunt. They both
enjoy reminiscing about the "good old days."
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