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TEVYE--THE DAIRYMAN--LOVED TO BOAST
Marjorie Gottlieb Wolfe
Syosset, New York
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I am currently enrolled in a course titled, "Sholem Aleichem: The Short Stories of the Jewish Mark Twain." The instructor is Rabbi Raphael Rank of the Midway Jewish Center in Syosset, New York.
Our textbook: "Tevye the Dairyman and The Railroad Stories." Yes, Tevye--the Bible-quoting dairyman--endures no end of "shreklekh" (terrible) events: a daughter's conversion to Christianity ("der meshumed anity"), another daughter's suicide, a stock-market disaster, and the family's expulsion from their village.
In the short story titled, "Hodl," we find Tevye engaging in "barimen zikh" (Yiddish words meaning to boast or brag). He says, "God forgive me for boasting. It's not a man's job to praise his own daughter, but you should hear the whole world tell me what knockouts they are! And most of all, my Hodl, who's next after Tsaytl, the one who fell for the tailor, if you recall. I can't begin to tell you how gorgeous she is--I mean Hodl, my second daughter; she's like the bible says of Queen Esther, ki tovas mar'eh hi--prettier than a picture.
And if looks aren't bad enough, the brains to go with them; she reads and writes both Yiddish and Russian and swallows books like hot cakes."
This boasting reminds me of a recent conversation I had with my youngest son, son, Daniel, who is the father of a 4-month-old son. He tells me on the telephone, "Mom, he's the most beautiful child you've ever seen. Big blue eyes, and the largest eyelashes you've ever seen." (He can't see my "smeykhl" (smile)!)
Jewish mothers--even those with adult children--boast. Harvey Fierstein's mom, Jacki, raved about her son, the Tony award-winning playwright: "Yeah, his picture is on the new Life magazine. But if you've got People magazine, he's one of the twenty-five most intriguing people. And, yeah, that's him, in Vogue, with the high hat.
I want you to know that he had a picture in Hustler. Harvey said, 'It's not such a nice magazine.' I could have killed him. I said, "I had to spend five dollars for that stupid magazine.' I couldn't even show it to my friends, because of what's on the back. So now I have to get it mounted." (Source: "The Jewish Mothers' Hall of Fame" by Fred A. Bernstein)
And Steven Spielberg's mother, Leah Adler, wrote about her son. She has the right to show off; Steven is the most popular filmmaker ever! "Among the reasons for Spielberg's success are his incredible energy, his un-selfconscious sense of humor, and his youthful, wide-eyed innocence--qualitites which he clearly inherited from his mother."
First she complained that [as a child], Steven's room was "such a mess, you could grow mushrooms on the floor. Once his lizard got out of its cage, and we found it--living--three years later. He refused to keep it in a cage altogether. It was disgusting. Once a week I would stick my head in, grab his dirty laundry, and slam the door."
Later, Leah wrote, "...she got a call from Stephen's secretary. 'Steven is sick,' she said, "and he wants you to make a pot of chicken soup. We'll send a limousine to get it." Leah, who was at the Milky Way, said, "Steven knows this is a dairy restaurant and I can't make chicken soup here." Five minutes later, Leah says, the secretary called back and said, "Steven says, 'Go home and make it.'"
Did she? "Of course," says Leah. "No one else makes Steven his chicken soup." (Source: "The Jewish Mothers' Hall of Fame" by Fred A. Bernstein)
So why are parents boasting about their children? A letter to the Berkeley Parents Network said,
"It's a sign of the times that parents are
bragging so much about their kids! A lot
has to do with paranoia that their kids
won't be able to afford the lifestyle they
have in the bay area. So they turn their
kids into super perfect human beings that
can speak 3 languages by age 5, do calculus
by age 7, play several musical instrument
by age 9, and start a non-profit by age 11.
And even that's not enough. They won't
stop bragging. My wife and I encounter this all the time and it
drives us crazy. My
advice to you is to do exactly what you said
which is to 'just start spending more time
with your friends who can talk about their
kids as if they were kids, not saints.' For
those parents who do otherwise, the best
advice is to politely change the subject.
If they continue to brag, then don't spend
time with them at all."
--------------------------------------------
Marjorie Wolfe agrees that "Nowadays,
children
are called bright when they make
remarks that
used to call for a good
spanking."
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