  
|
Marjorie Gottlieb Wolfe
Syosset, New York
|
|
*In Yiddish, the word "erliekh"/"erlekh" means honest
Q. What is every traveler's worst nightmare?
a) a lost wallet
b) a lost "pasport" (passport)
c) Montezuma's revenge (diarrhea or "shilshl")
d) lost "bagazh" (luggage)
e) "vants" (bed bugs) in your hotel mattress
A. All of the above
According to a recent study done by the Readers' Digest, a lost wallet is one of every traveler's worst nightmare while traveling in a foreign city.
They commissioned a study that involved dropping 12 wallets in prominent places in 16 major cities across the world. Each wallet had the equivalent of $50 in cash ("mezumen"), along with contact details and an assortment of family photographs. Less than half of the wallets were returned. The study concluded that "age is no predictor of whether a person is going to be honest or a "goniff" (dishonest). Young and "alt" (old), male and female, both kept or returned wallets.
The most "erlekh" (honest) city was Helsinki, Finland, where 11 of the 12 wallets were turned in, while the most money-grabby was Lisbon, Portugal, where only one lost wallet was returned (by a vacationing couple from Holland). The "gut naies" (good news)? New York, the only U. S. city on the list, tied with Budapest, Hungary, for 3rd place. Eight out of 12 wallets were returned.
The full results:
A woman named Lucy commented: "My city tied for third place, so I don't have to wonder. I've gotten back everything I've ever dropped in NYC, and I've given back everything I've ever seen someone drop or given it to a passing cop. We may be an impatient, tourist weary lot but we're generally honest and helpful when asked.
And now to a true Wolfe story:
Jonathan, my then 23-year-old son, who had recently graduated from Georgetown, called. He was living on the top floor of a 5-story building in Manhattan.
"Mom, I've got some bad news."
My first thought was that he purchased an eight-foot-tall metal unicycle and it wouldn't fit in his apartment. Or, perhaps he broke off with his Lycra-clad Rollerblade "significant other." Or, he's experiencing an unanticipated adverse cash-flow problem and is moving back home.
I was wrong on all counts.
Jonathan reported that his wallet was stolen, but that I SHOULDN'T WORRY
"I assume that you reported the loss to Visa, American Express, and Discover," I said rather calmly.
"It's not necessary," he responded. "Someone named Richard Pascal called. He found my plastic, driver's license and assorted photos... and will be mailing them back to me tomorrow.
"Son, this Blaise Pascal..."
"Mom, it's R-i-c-h-a-r-d Pascal, not Blaise, the 17th Century French mathematician and philosopher. Have you become computer litrate?"
"No, son," I replied. "Let's get back to the bad news, Jon. Haven't you heard of the recent scam which has been happening all over the country?"
"Which scam is that, Mom? The look-alike Rolex watch scam? The ‘chop shop'? The ‘modem maniacs' who crack the secret codes of computer installations? The 900 number scam? The fake invoice scam? Or, have you read the article in the Ladies' Home Journal about the fact that each week, thousands of lost items, most of them wallets and purses pass through the lost-and-found office at the Mall of America in Bloomington, Minnesota?"
"I'm referring to those thieves, rip-off-pros who steal wallets, place a telephone call to the owner to report that they found the discarded wallet, and then generously offer to mail back the recovered items. Since the credit card loss is NOT REPORTED, the thief has two or three days to charge with your cards."
"Oh, Mom, you're so skeptical--so untrusting."
"Son, take my word for it. The most dangerous lies are those that most resemble the truth. When you're my age,....."
"STOP!, Jon replied.
"Fan-TAS-tic. Do it your way, son, but you've been warned."
On Saturday, I purchased a new leather wallet, as well as a "Cope" Shoebox Greeting Card that read:
"I just wanted to let you know that any time life's got you down and you need some friendly advice or help with a problem, don't be afraid to pick up the phone. And dial 911. Love, Mom."
On Tuesday, Jon called. "Mom, guess what? The wallet, containing ALL of my credit cards and cash--arrived today by snail mail."
"Oh! Don't forget to send Mr. Fortran a thank-you note, Jon."
"It's Mr. Pascal, Mom."
"Good-bye, son."
"Good-bye, Mom."
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Marjorie Gottlieb Wolfe read that a "musey" (museum) is the
best place for a person to lose their wallet as their owners are more likely to have it returned.
| A | B | C | D | E | F | G | H | I | J | K | L | M |
| N | O | P | Q | R | S | T | U | V | W | Y | Z |
| Yiddish
Stuff Jewish Humor Schmooze News More Majorie Wolfe |
Principle Jewish Stories All Things Jewish Jewish Communities of the World |